Love Live Life...Then I'm Dead.

Well, basically there are a lot of thoughts going through my head at the moment. I'm so confused about a lot of the aspects of my life. My grades, my parents, cheerleading, and especially KYLE. I cannot tell you how lost I feel right now. The scary part is, I don't even know why. So anyways, I know you know how much I love Kyle. I truly do. With all of my heart and unconditionally. I have no clue what I would do if I lost him. He is my everything but with each day that passes, it gets harder and harder for me to deal with him being in North Carolina. I just found out today that I will hardly get to see him at all anymore because he got a job up there and he's going to have to work on the weekends. The worst part was that he was extremely mean about it when I asked him the details. It's just so hard knowing how in love we are and knowing that we'll hardly have anytime together at all.

Love is such a tricky emotion and I'm getting to where I hate it. Why can't I just not be so attached? I'll never understand what that boy has done to me. It's like I can't go 2 seconds without thinking about him. I don't know how I'm going to handle not being able to see him. He's seriously my other half and without him, I really don't know how to function. I miss him every second we're not together. If I don't marry that boy, I don't know who I'll marry because there is NO ONE else out there for me but him. Just the fact of me dating someone else makes me sick to my stomach. I need him. He makes me happier than I ever thought possible. He gives me this feeling of completion and without him, I'm just half a person.

Okay, I'm going on too much about this. I always think things are going to be worse than they actually are. Let's just hope it's like that this time too.

Peace.

It's Been A While...

Since my last post. I don't know why I even bother doing this because no one ever reads it, but oh well. Anyways, I'm so glad this week is almost over and I get to see my baby in less than 48 hours! I'm so excited! I went to the pageant tonight for 9th and 11th graders. Becca got both most photogenic and miss congeniality for the freshmen! i was so happy for her. Blair, Donna, and a bunch of my other friends got top 10 for the juniors so I'm really happy for them too. GOOD LUCK ON SATURDAY! Anyways, I have to go read for english, do a ton of chemistry homework, and read tonights APUSH so I better get off of here.

MUCH LOVE!

♥

Mondays...

So today has been quite boring and tiring. Nothing exciting has happened. Today we have cheer gym in North Carolina and I really don't want to go.

I think it's pretty lame that yesterday @ Furman clean up we got in trouble for taking Dippin' Dots. I mean, the freezer was unlocked. Also, I only had like one bite and I shouldn't have to be paying $3.00 for it.

Anyways, we have to condition for a whole day because of that too. I think it's pretty ridiculous. Oh well, what can I do?

Halloween is Wednesday. That's the only good thing about this week.
Also, this is Kyle's last week of the first program at PIT.
He starts Five On Five Off next week I think. I have no idea what that means, but I don't think I'm gonna like it because it makes me think I'm going to have to go 5 days without seeing him...a lot. Idk, I'll ask him tonight.

Well, the bell is about to ring for 7th period to start.

=]

Life...

So i'm sitting here in 4th period...bored. I'm bout to go to lunch in like one minute but I wanted to post really fast.

Life isn't going to great right now...this weekend was crazy and I'm really afraid
to go home because I'm pretty sure I'm in trouble with my mom and I have no idea why.
It kinda sucks. But anyways, I'll finish this later with more detail.

Holler.

I'm bored...

So I'm extremely bored and I have no idea why I'm doing this. I'm busy studying for a APUSH test and I needed a break so here I am.

Anyone who reads this i'm sorry if it's totally gay. Cuz I'm bored and have nothing to day.

anyways, gotta get back to studying now.

peace.